Episode 39: It’s Vital to Pause with Danielle North

Founded in 2013, Pause Global offers bespoke retreats and coaching for leaders. Led by a team of human transformation experts in beautiful locations around the world, Pause retreats have been attended by leaders from HSBC, Mars, BP and the United Nations.

The Pause method is based on the best-selling book by Danielle North, an international board level executive coach. For the last 15 years, she has helped teams and leaders across the world to pause in order to reach their next level of brilliance.

The philosophy of the Pause is simple, if you're going to perform in a world that's speeding up, sometimes you need to slow down...

In this episode, we talked about:

Danielle experienced burnout nearly 10 years ago
Productivity is often valued above rest. ‘Busy is better’ is an adage that many live by
For many people, the focus is on the outer world (goals and targets) rather than the inner world (thoughts, feelings, values and beliefs). Accessing the inner world requires being slower and more restful
An enforced pause provides a space to go inward and connect more deeply to what matters, and to get much-needed rest
You can go inward simply by sitting for a few minutes, ‘turning the eyeballs inwards’, and following the breath into the body. “Eyes are the windows to the world, but they are always looking outwards”
Exploring the inner landscape takes a little time, space and consciousness
When Danielle experienced her burnout, she was living and working in Singapore. As soon as she was able, she returned to the UK and went to a farm in Cornwall for a week’s holiday. She realised that she was unwell and extended her stay month by month in order to allow herself to recuperate.
“Piece by piece I discovered what I needed”
Pause evolved from an idea, into Danielle’s life’s work
Signs of needing to pause: being excessively busy, unable to switch off or “tired and wired”, chronic exhaustion, finding it hard to cope with even simple things, brain fog, crying a lot
Some doctors don’t acknowledge burnout
The World Health Organisation recognises workplace burnout
White space in the diary is a simple idea. Instead of going from one activity to the next, allow space to breathe. It’s like a running paragraph without any full stops. White space is time to do nothing and it can be planned into the diary. This might be easier to experiment with on a weekend
Having some space to meander
Opportunities for self-reflection and re-aligning with the things that matter to you if you can stay curious at this time
Alice Walker: “What it is referring to in this hexagram is something that I am going to call “the pause.” The moment when something major is accomplished and we are so relieved to finally be done with it that we are already rushing, at least mentally, into The Future. Wisdom, however, requests a pause. If we cannot give ourselves such a pause, the Universe will likely give it to us. In the form of illness, in the form of a massive Mercury in retrograde, in the form of our car breaking down, our roof starting to leak, our garden starting to dry up. Our government collapsing. And we find ourselves required to stop, to sit down, to reflect. This is the time of “the pause,” the universal place of stopping. The universal moment of reflection.”
From the I Ching, “if we don’t slow down and pause, then life will do it for us”
Retreating at home. Setting the space to keep returning to. A cushion, candles, incense and a plant or piece of nature all help to create a beautiful space. Putting things you love, and putting love into the space. You might use the space to turn inwards, do some breathing, journalling, meditating, reading or anything you choose
Using sage or palo santo or essential oils in the space to clear the energy and then build in love. Have the space contain or hold people so it feels safe and comforting
Care, love and attention are palpable in a space
Are you waking in the morning feeling sufficiently rested?
Matthew Walker - ‘Why We Sleep’
Low lighting in the evening and making the bedroom a nice place to go to
Danielle’s suggestions for working from home: keep your routines as if you were going to the office, delay turning on your devices, use the ‘travel time’ to do something nice for yourself, get dressed! Have proper breaks, set a finish time
Peloton are currently offering a free 3-month membership so you can exercise from home https://www.onepeloton.com/
Belonging and connection are important aspects that come from the workplace
Deeper the connection to the self with yoga, meditation or Qi Gong
Being in nature helps to amplify a sense of belonging
Get creative with virtual connections
Being ok with ambiguity and learning to trust
Control is an illusion
“Have a plan but hold it lightly”